pityfriend:

*jokes about making out with you until it actually happens*

(via lost-y0uth)

discare:

Do you ever just wish you could unmeet someone? like maybe they were great up first, or even for awhile. But then they cause you so much pain and sadness that it wasn’t even worth the good times. So now they’re just stuck in your life, in your fuckin thoughts. You want them out but nope, forever they’ll be part of you.

(via totheboykings)

“Are you the SAT because I’d do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes with a 10 minute break halfway through for snacks, and then I can stare at you for like 10 minutes and think ‘wow, I hope I don’t ruin this.’”
— Dude on OKC with the best pick up lines I have ever heard (via katamarang)

(via tastefullyoffensive)

When Autocorrect changes a word you didn’t spell wrong…

Q: Do you help the boners? Or do you—?
A: Full service. 

(via memewhore)

a-green-gold-depression:

beebuzzbee:

oh nooooooo


Oh dear

joshpeck:

when your friend makes an offensive joke but you don’t want to start anything with them

image

(via myboobscantelltheweatherr)